Diary of A Vipassana Retreat – Day 3

This is the third part of my series on my vipassana retreat in early may. Today i am writing down my notes from day three.

The alarm clock rings at 05:45, I am very tired, because I was already awake at shortly before 5 am. The morning meditation is therefore difficult for me at first. I have done several rounds walking outside in the courtyard beforehand. Towards the end of the one hour mediation again the feeling that arms and legs do not belong to me. I float at the level of my head. Feeling of absolute silence. In the gardening after breakfast I weed for 45min. At 09:15 the meditation continues. Here again quite quickly the feeling that arms and legs do not belong to me. Also the breathing does not belong to me, it just happens. I have the feeling to float in the air and my consciousness now encompasses the whole meditation room. After the short break after the walking mediation, I immediately go to my room to write my experiences down. Overall, I am very hungry and thirsty for just sitting and meditating.

In the next meditation session then the feeling that a sphere spreads around me. Shortly before the lunch break I have pain in the lumbar spine, I am tired and long for the lunch break. After the lunch break I have a chat with the meditation teacher. I do some yoga during the lunch break, take a walk in the forest, take a long shower and drink 2 cups of coffee with a piece of rhubarb pie. I am refreshed again. In the conversation the meditation teacher tells me that I reached the first level of immersion, jhana.

In the afternoon we do a new mediation, Vedanupassana. We go step by step through the body. The meditation lasts 50min. My arms and legs are no longer part of my body, the breathing pause is very long. Absolute silence. It is as if I float out of my body. Partly I only feel my eyes, the rest of my body is no longer there. I am very tired and exhausted after dinner. I would prefer to stay in my room and sleep, but I don’t want to miss the lecture.

The meditation teacher gives a lecture on the ego and the influence on meditation. I feel caught. He describes how transcendental experiences like from the first stage / jhana can affect the ego and you want to force it and that does not work. In the meditation after the lecture I was again very absorbed, the body disappeared I virtually floated above me, the breath was very still and calm. I am very tired after this eventful day.

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